Whichlaneareyou.com

Are you willing to change?

February 8th, 2010 by marcell, under Love. No Comments

Few weeks back, I attended my friend’s weeding. Then , I saw a girl and she looked very familiar. So, I asked my friend; ” Who is that girl?” After my friend told her name, then I remembered her. Gosh, she really changed a lot. I got the chance to meet and ask her about her new look. She told me that she totally changed due to the study, stress and work environment.

That’s bringing me to today’s topic, “Are you willing to change?” Let us focus in the context of relationship.

Let me ask a series of questions, “Do you willing to change for the sake of your relationship? Your partner request? Or you just want to change just to impress your partner?”

I saw a few people are willing to change themselves whether the physical outlook or their behaviour. Physical outlook I meant basically about your weight, your body curve, your hair style, your skin, your face and etc. Behaviour, for example, do be more gentle, get rid smoking, do be a dumber (this things do happen).

But really people this kinds of stuff to please and impress their loved one. That’s love. Love is blind.

I have few fundamental questions beside this changes. Are you happy with the changes? Do you like the new look? Or you do hate it? Or is it really waste of time or money?.

If it is really worth to do it and you are happy, that’s should be okay. But if it is the other way around, you’ll probably suffer. The solution for me so far is to get consensuses or agreement from each party. Important is Win-Win situation whereby both party are happy.

No tags for this post.

Kama Sutra: Sex Education Verse 2

February 5th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Lust. No Comments

Ya ya….I will continue… on another weird positioning but rationally should be ok to try. It can be a bit awkward for first timer I guess. It’s call the spoon position Dont laugh but the picture looks very difficult and kinky. BTW, why are we woman have to raise our leg high up…? hahaha

Every couple knows how to assume the spoon: Lie on your side with your guy behind you. Keep both of your torsos in this doze pose and lift your top leg. Have him shift his lower body into a half-kneeling position, entering you from behind.

This passion pose gives you the best of both worlds! The half-catty-style, half-spooning hybrid combines the cozy intimacy of lying side by side with G-spot-rubbing penetration. Nothing beats having him holding you tight while taking you higher. Give him a gentle reminder that both his hands are free, guiding them to caress your curves and stimulate your clitoris. Up his ante by reaching behind, fondling his testicles, and stroking his perinium as he thrusts.

This position I guess will be very good for married people in the 20s and 30s. Coming to your 40s, damn you need a lot of stamina MAN! If want to try, better explore now while young and vibrant

P/S: Happy trying people. If you were to ask me whether sex is important in marriage. YES! As a woman, I feel that as we aged we normally a bit lazy towards having it. But, that is what sharing in marriage is all about, chemistry and spiritually besides a day to day material world. Good Luck Folks!

No tags for this post.

Kama Sutra: Sex Education Verse 1

February 3rd, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Lust. No Comments

Just want to get dirty today. Actually it’s part of knowledge for all married people. Have you ever got tired of the position you and your partner are dealing with. Sometimes people said even in sex you have to be creative. I guess most of us like the missionary position. As long as both parties enjoy it why not try something new and more adventurous, right. You all must have known about kama sutra right? Anyone?

Yes, it is The Kama Sutra (Sanskrit: कामसूत्र), (alternative spellings: Kamasutraṃ or simply Kamasutra), is an ancient Indian text widely considered to be the standard work on human sexual behavior in Sanskrit literature written by the Indian scholar Mallanāga Vātsyāyana. A portion of the work consists of practical advice on sex. It is largely in prose, with many inserted anustubh poetry verses. Kāma means sensual or sexual pleasure, and “sūtra” literally means a thread or line that holds things together, and more metaphorically refers to an aphorism (or line, rule, formula), or a collection of such aphorisms in the form of a manual. The modern English word “suture” is derived from the same root.

The Kama Sutra is the oldest and most notable of a group of texts known generically as Kama Shastra (Sanskrit: Kāma Śāstra). Traditionally, the first transmission of Kama Shastra or “Discipline of Kama” is attributed to Nandi the sacred bull, Shiva’s doorkeeper, who was moved to sacred utterance by overhearing the lovemaking of the god and his wife Parvati and later recorded his utterances for the benefit of mankind. Hahaha that’s just the juice of it!

OK I know… bla bla bla. Let me get it straight and share one of many positions in Kama Sutra so called “Tantric Sex Positions”. This is one of many would maybe love it!

Instruction: Sit your man down with his legs crossed. Facing him, straddle his legs and lower yourself into his lap — without him penetrating you. Wrap your legs around either side of his torso, so they’re hugging his buttocks. Then, as you hold each other’s arms or lower backs tightly, he enters you. Start to slowly rock back and forth together, increasing your speed as you come closer to climaxing.

Like the standard missionary position, this takes eye contact and body-to-body closeness to the max but adds a passion perk. The comfy upright pose encourages equal control over the speed and timing of his thrusting, allowing for a gradual buildup of pleasure for both partners. Plus, your clitoris is at an easy-to-reach angle, allowing him to stroke your love button without interrupting the hot-and-heavy action. That’s the description.

P/S: Happy trying you great couple people. Enjoy them with your love ones. If you have any further request, I will show more in the next sharing

No tags for this post.

Cerita Siput… The Snail Story ;)

January 29th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Hug. No Comments

siput1

siput2

siput3

siput4

siput5

siput6

P/S: Love u all… Happy weekend!

No tags for this post.

Forgive Me

January 27th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Hug. No Comments

Me these days become a big fan of LL…

There’s a first time for everything
It’s definitely one of them nights
I knew when I looked in his eyes
That he was gonna be trouble for me
I never wanted to lie
I knew that my baby would cry
If he knew what we were doing
But if his love don’t pass the test
I gotta get it from somewhere else
When I’m gone and I need a man
Hope he understands
Forgive me baby

I gotta take a chance tonight
So I’m doing me, myself and I
Can wait no more
Sitting all alone
Man, I really hope
Hope you forgive me
Oh oh
Hope you forgive me
Oh oh
Hope you forgive me
Oh oh
I can wait no more
Man, I really hope
Hope you forgive me

Been a long time since I
Did something good for myself
But why should I be put through hell?
He’s doing what he wanna do
I finally found somebody else
Who really wants to make me feel
Things that I’ve been missing so long
And his love always passed the test
It’s a shame I had to look somewhere else
When I’m gone and I need a man
I just hope that he understands
Forgive me baby

Forgive me but I need to be loved too
Forgive me but I can’t wait around for you
Forgive me if I found a man
Who understands just what I need
Forgive me but I need to be loved too
Forgive me if I can’t wait around for you
Forgive me if I found a man who understands
Forgive me baby

I gotta take a chance tonight
So I’m doing me, myself and I
Can wait no more
Sitting all alone
Man, I really hope
Hope you forgive me

Thanks Leona Lewis!

No tags for this post.

Kids N Divorce

January 22nd, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Hug, Kiss, Love. 1 Comment

Being a single parent is not easy. That much I can tell. And it becomes more challenging when you have kids in between. You just have to deal with your Ex till death do us part. That is how tough it is. To hurt your kids in any way is the last thing that you want to do. Thus, last night, I just went thru some readings that I like to share with you all on this portion.

When parents decide to divorce, they typically have been through a series of events that have led them to this decision. Whether or not children are aware of parents’ decisions depends on many things, including parents’ behaviors and children’s experiences. In some families, husbands and wives may argue frequently in front of the children, leaving children to suspect that something is going on. In other families, parents may talk quietly about their differences without the children ever knowing. And in other families, parents may argue sometimes and quietly handle their differences at other times. Regardless of the type of adult arguments and interactions that children experience, when parents decide to divorce, children need to know.

Children’s reactions to parental divorce are related to how parents inform them of their decision. Because of this, it is important for parents to think carefully about how they will tell their children and what they will tell them. When possible, the entire family should meet together so that both parents can answer children’s questions.

What to tell children

Remember that divorce is confusing for children. When you first talk with children, limit your discussion to the most important and most immediate issues; children can become confused if they are given too much information at once. Children need to hear that their basic needs will be met, that someone will still fix breakfast in the morning, help them with their homework, and tuck them into bed at night. Children also need to know that their relationship with BOTH parents will continue, if possible. In the face of so many changes, children also need to hear what will remain the same. Parents can reassure their children through words and actions that their love will continue despite the changes in routine family life.

During these family discussions, it is important for parents to tell children that the divorce is final and avoid giving children false hopes that the parents will reunite. Parents can also use this time to tell children that the divorce is not their fault. Many children believe that the divorce is a result of something that they did. Even younger children who seem to have no understanding of what is going on may need extra reassurance during this time. For instance, when asked why parents divorce, some children may explain that parents are divorcing because the children misbehaved or received bad grades in school. Children need repeated reassurance from parents that they are not responsible for the divorce.

Remember to ask children about their fears and concerns. Give children time to think about the divorce and the changes ahead. Meet again as a family to talk about new questions and to reassure children of your ongoing involvement in their lives.

Take your children’s questions and concerns seriously and LISTEN to what they say. As stated by one child, “this is gonna affect the rest of my life and I don’t know if they just don’t realize that, or don’t care, or what, but I don’t feel like I’m being heard.”

Children need to know that parents recognize the impact of divorce on children’s lives. By listening to children’s thoughts and feelings about the divorce, parents demonstrate their ongoing care and concern.

Realize that feelings of loss and anger are typical. You can’t change your child’s feelings, but it is important to let your child know you understand them. For example, “I know you must be really sad that you can’t see your dad today.”

What I need from my mom and dad:

* I need both of you to stay involved in my life. Even if you don’t live close by, please write letters, make phone calls, and ask me lots of questions about who I spend time with and what I like and don’t like to do. When you don’t stay involved in my life, I feel like I’m not important and that you don’t really love me.
* Please stop fighting and work hard to get along with each other. Try to agree on matters related to me and my needs. When you fight about me, I think that I did something wrong and I feel guilty.
* I want to love you both and enjoy the time that I spend with each of you. Please support me and the time that I spend with each of you. If you act jealous or upset, I feel like I need to take sides and love one parent more than the other.
* Please communicate directly with my other parent so that I don’t have to send messages back and forth. I want you to talk with each other so that the messages are communicated the right way and so that I don’t feel like I am going to mess up.
* When talking about my other parent, please say only nice things, or don’t say anything at all. When you say mean, unkind things about my other parent, I feel like you are putting me down and expecting me to take your side.
* Please remember that I want both of you to be a part of my life. I count on my mom and dad to raise me, to teach me what is important, and to help me when I have problems.

Kids Understandings

* Recognize that one parent no longer lives at home.
* May express empathy toward others, such as a parent who is feeling sad.

Feelings

* May have difficulty separating from parents.
* May express anger toward parent.
* May lose some of the skills they have developed, like toilet training.
* Toddlers may show some of the behaviors that they outgrew, such as thumbsucking.
* Sleeping and naptime routines may change.
* Older toddlers may have nightmares.

What parents can do…

* Spend more time with children when preparing to separate (e.g., arrive 10 to 15 minutes earlier than usual when you take your child to child care).
* Provide physical and verbal reassurance of your love.
* Show understanding of child’s distress; recognize that, given time and support, old behaviors (thumbsucking) will disappear and newly developed skills (toilet training) will reappear.
* Talk with other important adults and caregivers about how to support your child during this transition time.

The reading is quite long until preschoolers and teens… Maybe I will share about that on my later life having both of them growing up.

To the love of my life: Danish and Arissa. Love you ALWAYS and FOREVER!

No tags for this post.

RESPECT!

January 20th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Hug. No Comments

Being in a good relationship means you don’t have to agree on everything, such as liking all of each other’s friends and interests, but it does mean respecting each other’s opinion and behaving well towards each other’s friends and family. It’s being able to sort out differences about things and friends that are important to you.

A good relationship has an established pattern of listening to each other and working through differences in very practical ways. For example, if you want to go shopping with your friends on Saturdays, your boyfriend is able to do something he likes that you’re not so keen on, such as jamming with friends.

People are willing to change in good relationships. Some young men have some ideas about being entitled to some things that women aren’t. Respectful men will change when you point out something is not fair and is causing you problems.

(If you find that you are having to repeat yourself frequently and no long term change is happening, you may be in an unfair relationship)

No tags for this post.

Trust & respect

January 18th, 2010 by marcell, under Hug, Love. No Comments

How are you there? I hope you are in a good shape. Now, we are stepping in 2010 and I bet some of you have a list of this year resolution. My advice is write it down and stick at any visible place that you can see it everyday. Back to today’s’ topic, trust and respect.

This topic was discussed out during my meeting up with a group of friends. We were chatting about marriage life. A lot of questions were brought up but there was a particular question that made our conversation became very hot.

The question: “What are the main factors to build up the relationship in marriage life?”

One of them answered: “Trust & respect”. She further explained on these two factors.

” Trust, it is the main essence and with that, it act as a foundation in the relationship. That should be the starting point to build the relationship. No point of having relationship, if you don’t trust each other.

Then, respect. Having relationship doesn’t mean you have to obstruct freedom of each other. Respect on their decision. Respect on their freedom. In relationship, we need our own space. Yup, space to breath. Space to move around. Space to relax the mind.”

I tend to agree with her opinion. Yup, indeed that it is really make a lot of sense.

So, nuture your relationship wth trust and respect

No tags for this post.

What should I do to marry a rich guy?

January 15th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Hug. No Comments

This is an interesting situation of a 25 year old girl (presumably beautiful) seeking to get married to a man whose annual income exceeds US$500K…..Amuse yourself to see how tactfully the CEO of J.P. Morgan replied her

> A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
>

> Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

>   I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here.
>
>
>
>   I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k
>   annual salary or above. You might say that I’m
>   greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.
>   My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who
>   has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?
>
>
>
>   I wanted to ask: What should I do to marry rich persons like you?
>
>
>
>   Among those I’ve dated, the richest is
>   $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my
>   upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area
>   on the west of New York City Garden (?), $250k annual income is not enough.
>
>
>   I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:
>
>   1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the
>   names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
>
>   2) Which age group should I target?
>
>   3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking?
>   I’ve met a few girls who don’t have looks and are not interesting,
>   but they are able to marry rich guys.
>
>   4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your
>   girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)
>
>
>   Ms. Pretty
>
>
>
>   An awesome reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan:
>
>
>   Dear Ms. Pretty,
>

>
>   I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there
>   who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyze
>   your situation as a professional investor. My annual
>   income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope
>   everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint
>   of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you.
>
>
>   The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
>
>
>   Put the details aside, what you ‘ re trying
>   to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money” :
>   Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
>
>
>   However, there’s a deadly problem here,
>   your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone
>   without any good
>   reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you
>   can ‘ t be  prettier year
>   after year. Hence from the viewpoint of
>   economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It ‘ s
>   not just normal depreciation, but
>   exponential depreciation. If that is your only
>   asset, your value will be
>   much worse 10 years later.
>
>
>
>   By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a
>   position, dating with you is also a “trading position”.
>
>
>
>   If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good
>   idea to keep it
>   for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be
>   cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision
>   any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”.
>

>   Anyone with over $500k annual
>   income is not a fool; we would only date you, but
>   will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any
>   clues to marry a rich guy.
>
>
>   And by the way, you could make
>   yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual
>   income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

>
> Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in “leasing” services, do contact me.

>
> Signed,

>
> J.P.
> Morgan CEO

No tags for this post.

iNFATUATION or LoVe…

January 13th, 2010 by ilabuzz, under Love. No Comments

I am not in delusion. I just said I like you that’s all. Not to the extend of love though and it takes a lot of chemistry, energy and heartfelt to love someone…

What is the elusive thing called “Love” that everyone so desperately needs? Sometimes, we sort of like this girl because she is beautiful? Or the girl likes him because he is handsome? But this kind of “Cinderella Syndrome” when the girl is waiting on her Prince Charming is not real love. It is better known as “Infatuation”, and there is a vast difference between it and real love. Enumerated here below are the differences. Find out if you are really in love and not just infatuated.

What is Infatuation?

Infatuation is a feeling; real love involves a commitment. Infatuation is just love of emotion. Real love though, is love of devotion. Only the emotions are affected in infatuation, but in real love both the Emotions and Will are involved. Next, a person “fall into” infatuation, but “grows into” real love.

Gentlemen, have you ever seen a girl who was so beautiful that you thought you’d faint? This is infatuation. It is based totally on physical attraction; Often you don’t know much in-depth about the person you so-called love. Thus infatuation is mostly biological. There are some feelings we have when infatuated that we don’t have when we’re feeling love. Some of the “symptoms” of infatuation are; feelings of panic, uncertainty, overpowering lust, feverish excitement, impatience, and/or jealously.

When infatuated, we are thrilled, but not happy, wanting to trust, yet suspicious. There are lingering, nagging doubts about our “partner in infatuation” and their love for us. We’re miserable when they’re away, almost like we’re not complete unless we’re with them. It’s a rush and it’s intense. It’s difficult to concentrate. And most infatuation relationships have a high degree of sexual charge around them.Somehow being with them is not complete unless in ends in some type of sexual encounter.

Do any of these “symptoms” resemble feelings of love? Hardly. So why do we become infatuated? Where does it come from? Perhaps it’s biological AGAIN as explained.

When infatuated we experience a surge of dopamine that rushes through the brain causing us to feel good. Norepinephrine flows through the brain stimulating production of adrenaline (pounding heart). Phenylethalimine (found in chocolate) creates a feeling of bliss. Irrational romantic sentiments may be caused by oxytocin, a primary sexual arousal hormone that signals orgasm and feelings of emotional attachment. Together these chemicals sometimes override the brain activity that governs logic.

The body can build up tolerances to these chemicals so it takes more of the substance to get that special feeling of infatuation. People who jump from relationship to relationship may be craving the intoxicating effects of these substances and may be “infatuation junkies”.

When the chemical flood dries up, the relationship either moves into a loving romantic one or there is disillusionment, and the relationship ends.

P/S: Me hope for everyone in infatuation to move the relationship to a loving romantic one! Thanks sayg for the topic!

No tags for this post.

« Older Entries Recent Entries »